Transition and Transformation

A friend noticed that I mention transition and transformation on my website and asked if I could differentiate between them so that it would be clear for the reader. Let me provide a simplified explanation and then I will delve deeper:

Transition is the dusty desert road you are on. Transformation is your arrival in another state, another state of being.

Each of us is on a journey through life. Often along that journey, we happen to find ourselves maybe not lost but feeling like we are without direction or find that what was happening previously (marriage, career, clarity of purpose, etc.) has diminished or is completely lost. During times like that on the journey, we don’t know what is next but feel a longing to reach the next destination. We know we are “in between” things. We have not arrived. We desire to feel settled. We desire to know where we stand. We seek to be, if not in control, then at least to have a sense that our life is improving and that there is hope, and a chance for things to improve. We may in a sense feel that we are homeless even though we have a home. That is how with so many words I would describe what is a transition. That is the dusty desert road where you cannot see any road signs, nor can you see what lies at the end of the road. It is not only uncomfortable but any magnetic sensing as to which direction is true north or where we need to head is not felt. And, yes, you can get through a transition and arrive at what is next in your life and not be transformed. In other words, you can travel through the transition and not arrive at another state of being. You could arrive at another relationship, another job, or a deeper understanding of your life and your place in it but not have transformed into another state of being. And that is OK and often to be desired. “You may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful wife” as the song says. It is because of this very understanding of transition that I do not coach just to guide others in finding the next job, career, or relationship. Often when in transition, it is not forcing the next big change or recreating a more improved relationship or career that is most beneficial to the individual. It is easy to hide from yourself. Easy for what is deep within your heart to be hidden. What is hidden may be what is most important to your soul and, in fact, who you truly are in the deepest sense. And that is where transformation comes in and what I focus on in my coaching.

As stated on the Fearless Coaching page on my website, “My focus is on the future self of my clients. When a client answers the questions that arise during challenging conversations, meaningless problems, limiting beliefs, and useless habits are shed as an old cocoon.”

A transformation is arriving at a different state of being not unlike the caterpillar becoming a butterfly. It is obvious to the whole world that the caterpillar is gone and that the butterfly is a new creature. It lives in the air and thrives on nectar rather than meandering along branches only focused on consuming more leaves and growing as big as possible. I don’t know what an individual needs to transform, but I know that every individual has the imaginal cells within them to become what they may not even know is possible. My mission as an intuitive coach is to assist others by listening deeply and sometimes asking uncomfortable questions. Hopefully, this way of engaging provides a glimpse into an individual client’s greater possibility. Yet, if the current limiting beliefs of a client are too ingrained, I may not be able to foster a coaching relationship that helps to bring about a transformation. Caterpillars are marvelous creatures and cocoons are safe and secure enclosures but they each are only stages of a greater beauty and grander possibilities. So, it is for each one of us, especially when in a transitional state. I believe the transitional state of an individual holds the most promise for transformation to become a reality.